Know your worth, no matter what
Self-esteem issues can be crippling in many aspects of life. They can be so crippling that they prevent us from succeeding in our careers, sabotage our intimate relationships and stop us from experiencing the joy that should be part of life.
When we suffer from low self-esteem we don’t have faith in ourselves, we can behave jealously and feel victimized by life even when its not rational. Feeling out of control of our lives, constantly comparing ourselves to others, not putting down boundaries and engaging in people-pleasing behaviours are all symptoms of low self-esteem as well.
Self-esteem is not about how much you’ve accomplished, its not about how much you like yourself. Self-esteem is about you seeing that you are deserving of life’s pleasures including financial abundance, love, enjoyment and more. Its about how you let other people treat you, its about you knowing that your voice has value.
People with low self-esteem have trouble receiving compliments. Because they have a low opinion of themselves they find it difficult to receive positive feedback from others.
Low self-esteem causes people to focus on their flaws rather than their strengths. Rather than build themselves up with positive self-talk, they often spiral in their minds with negative self-talk.
When things go wrong, people with low self-esteem often blame themselves. They find fault with some aspect of themselves, whether it is their appearance, their personality, or their abilities.
People with low self-esteem can feel that they don’t deserve a relationship or a partner that is healthy for them and they may settle on something that doesn’t feel good.
It may surprise you but having self-esteem is first and foremost about having boundaries. You’re a good friend not because you say “yes” to every social invitation or agree with the people in your social circle on everything.
You are a good partner because you inspire your partner to be a better person around you, because you don’t put up with bad behaviour or neglect. You don’t always go along with what your partner wants or thinks and you don’t overextend yourself to prove your worth.
Its the same with parenting, you don’t let your identity as parent subsume everything else about you. You don’t overindulge them to make up for a perceived lack.
When we are secure in our imperfect selves, we exude a confidence that is organic and that attracts the right people to you.
You create an intimate relationship out of desire—not need—the kind of relationship where you are loved, seen and appreciated for being exactly you.